Those Who Take Life Toooo Seriously:

•   Effective way to remember the wife's birthday . . . forget it once.
•    If you lose your left arm . . . your right one will be left.
•     Experience is what you get whenever . . . you don't get what you want.
•     Behind every successful man is . . . a very surprised woman.
•     If today is the first day of the rest of your life . . . what the hell was yesterday?
•     Don't let aging get you down . . . It's too hard to get back up.
•     Living on this planet is getting so expensive . . . but it does include a  free trips around the sun.
•     Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes . . . then you'll be a mile away from them and you'll have a new pair of shoes.
•     Being punctual every time . . . people will think you have nothing better to do.